281 Ofcom Complaints and David Attenborough’s head? Welcome to the Great British Bake Off 2020!


 The death toll continues to rise and the pandemic as poorly managed as ever. Tens of thousands (including myself) face redundancy. Even the immortal bronze robot, Donald Trump, is grappling with mortality. 

 But for the people of Britain, normalcy has returned. Despite the apocalyptic hellscape playing out in the news, the comfort of Cake Week, and the return of the Great British Bake Off  has finally returned. 

 Once again the British public is being asked to adapt to a “new normal” as much beloved Sandi Toksvig has waved goodbye to the tent. Matt Lucas and Noel Fielding continue the legacy of the bakers’ emotional support comedians. Whilst there is something somewhat unnerving about Lucas’ extremely shiny head, the familiar white tarpaulin embrace of the tent continues to soothe the nation’s nerves. 

Judges, contestants, and filming crew spent the duration of the series living in a ‘bubble’. Not even the end of the world can stop the rise of The Tent.

 Feathers have been ruffled as the series controversially kicked off with Lucas, dressed as Boris Johnson, giving a public address. Stood behind his podium with the message: Stay alert. Protect Cake. Save Loaves, Lucas informed viewers about the safe distribution of hundreds of thousands, and that we should, but also should not bake in a tent. 

Never before has so much been baked by so few for so many. “Johnson” addresses the nation.

  Offcom received 181 complaints due to the skit. Officials are still deciding if Lucas’ performance broke broadcasting rules. 

 This is not the first time the usually idyllic Bake Off has caused outrage. Faithful viewers of the show may remember Baked Alaska-gate or the particularly well-endowed squirrel from 2011. 

Nightmarish results from this year’s first show stoppers. Louis Theroux and Sir David Attenborough, staring deep into your soul with their marzipan eyes.

 After the most viewed premier since the show was bought by Channel 4, fans eagerly await the third installment of this year’s Bake Off. We are yet to see if Paul Hollywood’s steely gaze can scare the Covid from a contestant. Perhaps that will be next week’s show stopper!

 The Great British Bake Off continues Tuesdays, 8pm, Channel 4.


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